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5 Biggest Reasons Why People Get Divorced

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Despite how many people say their vows hoping their marriage will last forever, the reality is staying together doesn’t always happen. There are a variety of factors that come into play when it comes to why divorce happens. 

Understanding why makes it easier to navigate your own marriage and question whether you may be headed down the same path. Take a look at some of the leading causes of why people end up getting divorced. 

Arguing  

Many studies show that even happy couples argue now and then. It’s unrealistic to expect never butting heads with someone occasionally. Yet, even though arguing may be sometimes okay in doses, it’s not something that anyone wants to do day in and day out. 

Couples who find themselves bickering all day long over the smallest things will eventually end in divorce. Too much conflict is exhausting and causes a couple to lose sight of what they loved about each other in the first place. If you can’t resolve your arguments calmly, then it will only get worse over time.   

Once too much conflict has taken place in a couple, two people in a relationship start to associate the other with only negative feelings. 

Infidelity 

According to experts, infidelity is a symptom of a problem and not the root cause. However, as many as 60% of divorces happen as a result of cheating. In relationships that are already on the rocks, cheating is the final straw that breaks the camel’s back. 

When two people feel lonely in a relationship, one or more of them turns to someone else for feelings of companionship. The result is an extramarital affair that ultimately leads to the demise of their marriage. 

Health Issues 

If one person in the relationship has serious health issues, it can start to create a damper on the couple. Health issues can lead to more than just physical discomfort. They can also create a considerable amount of debt. If one person in the relationship is draining all of the resources due to their illness, it can start to create a strain on the relationship. A health problem is an ultimate test of whether a couple can withstand hard times together. 

Violence 

A recent survey showed that as many as 20% of divorced couples claimed the reason for their separation was because of physical abuse. Cycles of violence rarely improve themselves on their own. 

It usually gets worse every time that it happens. Although therapy can help a couple turn page which has been violent with each other, it will likely happen again. 

Alcohol 

A startling two out of five divorces are because of at least one partner abusing alcohol. Alcohol creates not only a distance between two people but also a physical dependency leading to extreme behavioral changes and health problems. 

If two people in the relationship are dependent on alcohol, then the situation can be even more volatile. 

3 Musts For Surviving Divorce

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Regardless of whether your divorce was your choice or not, the reality is that divorce is a difficult experience for anyone. The entire process itself is admitting that something you committed to, didn’t work out. Saying goodbye to something that once meant so much to you is a difficult situation to find yourself in. 

Even though you may feel a mix of highs and lows, most people admit that there are a considerable amount of hard days. 

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The 3 Best Options for Parents Who Want Perfect Kids

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Okay, so there’s really no such thing as a perfect kid. But we can all hope, right? We can all aim for the stars, and we won’t be all that upset if we don’t make it all the way. Still, what are some options that give parents the best opportunities to create children with good behavior patterns and charisma and emotional intelligence?

There are several choices that parents can make, especially early on, that will help improve the chances of guiding a child successfully. There is the matter of daycare choices. There is the decision to intentionally keep children away from too much screen time on devices. And there are plenty of character building exercises to move through as well, depending on contexts such as the age of the child and the environment that they’re in.

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The Effects of Divorce on a Family Unit

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People who get married don’t always want to stay together forever. Even if they have the best intentions at the beginning, many marriages end up in separation and divorce. And the effects of that divorce on the family unit can be very dramatic. It is up to the people involved to try to create the best situation possible after it’s all done though.

So what are some of these effects, and what can be done about them to try to smooth the process over? There are the visible emotional effects of divorce on a family unit, especially when children are involved. Adults and parents have to work with the legal system to mitigate some of the legal and financial risks involved in a divorce. Then there are the matters of child support and child custody that often create ripples through a family’s social fabric. [Read more…] about The Effects of Divorce on a Family Unit

4 Biggest Mistakes Couples Make When Going Through a Divorce

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When two people come together in hopes of building a life together forever, the last thing on their minds is breaking up one day.  Unfortunately, it’s all too common for even the happiest of relationships to end in a bitter dispute.

When emotions are running high, people are capable of being incredibly vindictive and cutthroat in hopes of walking away as the proclaimed “winner” of a divorce dispute.  This can make things even more complicated when there are children involved.

If you’re someone going through a divorce, you should make sure that you learn from the mistakes that others have made before you and avoid the following common errors.

Posting Too Much On Social Media

Even though social media is a great tool to be able to express yourself and feel like you have a community to share with, it can work against you.  Posting about personal issues could give your former spouse ammunition against you. You could be accused of reckless behavior, and your photos could be dissected in a court of law claiming you are an unfit parent.

You’re better off saving your personal issues for your close friends and family in a less public environment.  Until you’re out of the clear of a nasty divorce, you should keep a low profile.

Dating Too Quickly

A lot of people come out of a relationship ready to move on.  They’ve been unhappy for so long that the idea of finding someone who can provide them happiness is promising and exciting.

However, moving too quickly into a new relationship doesn’t only have the potential to get you into legal trouble since you’re still married, but you may end up getting hurt.

Often people think they’re ready for a new relationship. However, they soon realize that they haven’t moved on yet.  It’s best to take things slowly to ensure that you’re actually mentally prepared to make a new commitment.

Making Threats

When things get particularly heated in a divorce one may threaten the other which results in a series of threats back and forth.

Acting out violently or being emotionally abusive can work against you in a court of law if the other party provides evidence.  You’re better off staying as peaceful as possible even if it’s challenging.

Involving The Kids

Talking to your kids about how angry you are with the other parent isn’t healthy for your children’s development.

It’s important to remain emotionally neutral as much as possible so that your child doesn’t feel forced to choose sides. If you genuinely think that the other party has done wrong, your child will grow up one day to see it for themselves.  It’s not up to you or your role to convince them of it.

 

3 Tips For Speaking To Your Kids About Your Divorce

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Choosing to get a divorce from your spouse is hard enough without having to break the news to your children as well. But because so much of this new situation is going to involve your kids, it’s crucial that you handle the discussion of this topic in the right way. The way your children find out about your divorce will be something they remember for the rest of their lives, so you want to be sure that you tackle this subject carefully. To help with this, here are three tips for speaking to your kids about your upcoming divorce.

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5 Tips for Staying Calm When Your Children Throw a Tantrum

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The toddler portion of your child’s life can be expected to be full of protests, arguments, and at least occasionally, full-on tantrums. When you experience your first toddler explosion, you may feel lost, with no idea how to handle this angry little person.

The key is staying calm. Even though their hysterical energy is infectious and every fiber of your being wants to yell “Get over it already!” — remaining calm will solve more in the long run. [Read more…] about 5 Tips for Staying Calm When Your Children Throw a Tantrum