Do I have what? What in the world is parental street cred? Well, let’s start with street cred. According to the Urban Dictionary, street cred is:

So what does it have to do with parenting? Pam Stillman, one of our readers, brought a new site to our attention – ParentalStreetCred. It is about being seen as “cool” by your children and at the same time exhibiting good parental skills.

I paid a visit to the site and was immensely amused by the instructional videos on offer. I like how they used a geeky (sorry for the term but it seems so appropriate) man to give tips to parents. In this site, parents will learn how to relate to their kids, who may seem to be worlds apart from them. Topics include saying hello, dance floor etiquette, skateboarding, clothing, dissing, and video games.

Though the videos may seem a bit goofy at first, the pointers offered are quite practical and provide various insights to our children. Let us say that it is a refreshing way of looking at the differences in generations. One thing I’d like to say, though, I really prefer the PS3 to the Xbox360, which is the sponsor of this site. Does that mean I have more parental street cred???

Are you a good listener? I actually find it amusing that I got the idea for this post from one of those online quizzes in a social networking site. I like taking those quizzes when I am passing away time. They may not be as accurate as they can be but they are fun and sometimes, provides valuable insight – like this one. As I was reading my results (I am supposedly a good listener although I don’t always come across as one), I could not help by relate the topic to being a parent.

As Munashe shares in his blog, the art of listening is perhaps one of the most important – if not THE most important - things that a parent should develop. What does the art of listening entail?

I believe that it is more than sitting there and hearing the things that your child has to say. It is not a passive activity but an interactive one. You actively listen by understanding what your child is saying and contributing something to the conversation. More so, listening entails understanding that maybe, at times, your child just wants to be heard and does not really need to be told what to do.

I think that is one problem that arises when children share things with their parents – we sometimes automatically think that we need to provide a solution to whatever they are presenting. Have you ever thought that maybe your child just wants to rant and let off steam and be heard? I sure know that I feel that way a lot of times.

So do you take the time out to really listen to your child? How do you listen?

Financial smarts are learned through a lifetime of lessons. I believe that it is best to start at a young age. People who do not learn financial sense in their childhood or teenage years are probably the ones who have the most trouble handling their finances as adults. GoodParenting posted an entry on this topic sometime last week and though it focused mainly on teaching children the value of wealth (with the assumption that you are relatively wealthy), the insights presented are valuable.

I particularly like the point which says “make them accountable for every expense they make and every penny they spend.” I believe that this is part of teaching children how to be responsible financially. I do not know at what age you want to start giving your children allowances but let’s say once they start going to school. With this privilege, parents must instill a sense of responsibility – they must ensure that their children understand that they are to be accountable for what they spend. Parents must also go one step further and be firm in disciplining their children. For example, if the allotted allowance is spent before the next one is due, they should not coddle their children and simply give them more.

What I have shared above is merely my opinion. Surely other parents may have their own point of view in this matter. What about you, what is your stand?

Teenagers may not be the most responsible group of people in the world. Though I am saying this at the risk of labeling and stereotyping people, I think it is true in many cases. I still remember being a teenager and how it felt back then. I had my sense of responsibility, no doubt about that, but the sense of adventure and being invincible oftentimes overwhelmed my sensibilities.

One of our readers sent in a link to a video on YouTube, suggesting that we take a look at it and see what we think. You know what? I got scared while watching the video. Maybe I am being the “paranoid mom” but watching that young girl lie to her mom over the phone and through text message just unnerved me. The video was short – it was actually an ad for Safeco Insurance – but it detailed how the teenaged girl told her mom that she and friends were going to rent a movie then go straight home to her friend’s house. As it turned out, she went to a party at someone else’s house.

Issues that I feel are important:

-not telling the truth or feeling that she had to hide her activities from her parents
-drinking when she had to drive home
-being pressured by her friend (who by the way was pushy).

I got scared because I would not want my teenager to act that way. I want my children to grow up as responsible human beings who will not feel the need to hide such things from their parents. I want my children to be able to realize what is right and wrong and to have their own mind. Tough, huh? But I think it’s every parent’s dream. The question is, how do you encourage responsibility in your children?

One of my best friends and fellow mom sent a link to an article the other day with a message that read: “I’d ship Max to Iraq if she turned out like this…” referring to her angelic 1-year-old, who also happens to be my Godchild.

The article was disturbing indeed, and after reading it, I heartily agreed that if my 5-year-old N turned out that way too, she’d be joining Maxine for Iraqui bootcamp asap. Having said that though, much as this misguided teenager seems like a Veruca Salt from designer hell, one can’t help but blame her parents for creating this monster in Dior.

Anyway, it was a feature from the lifestyle pages of a newspaper about “Tara” the daughter of a socialite. Addicted to shopping and designer labels, she sounded more like Posh Spice rather than a 17 year old kid in high school. It was utterly hideous. Here’s some of the interview for your cringing pleasure:

Where and how often do you shop?

I shop like hell after a painful break-up. Does that explain a lot? (laughs) Or whenever I feel the need for a lift. No, I do not shop every single day! Its more like once a week.

What are your favorites?

My blue jean 35-cm. Hermes Kelly purchased from Hermes at The Peninsula Hotel, Hong Kong. Apart from the fact that I didn’t get waitlisted for it, it holds a lot of sentimental value for me. I clearly remember finding the bag with someone special to me at the time. As for shoes, my favorite would have to be my black Manolo Blahnik pumps. They go with absolutely anything. And how could I forget my Louis Vuitton limited edition monogram cerise Speedy?! It served me really well.

What was your first designer purse?

I honestly don’t know. All I remember is being raised in Baby Dior so it could’ve been Dior or maybe Ferragamo (a favorite of my mom’s when I was younger). The first designer bag I actually remember getting was the Louis Vuitton monogram canvas pochette from my dad. I think it was a gift for my ninth or 10th birthday and I didn’t think much of it at the time (Vuittons weren’t as expensive then).

Largest amount of money you spent in one go? Did you regret it?

I haven’t any idea. I’m just sure that I didn’t regret it.

How do your parents feel about your shopping habits?

I’d imagine that they aren’t very happy about it. What sane person would be?

What bag are you currently drooling over?

I’ve always wanted an Hermes Birkin in whatever leather, 40-cm in lime green or fuchsia pink. I do plan to get one but not at the moment. You see, I havent been a very good girl lately

Do you attend sales?

Sure! Sales are great actually but then I do feel bad sometimes when high-end designer brands go on sale. The reason my mother and I love Vuitton so much is because they never have sales so you never get the painful feeling of being cheated (for lack of a better word). For example, I buy a bag today and see someone else carrying the exact same bag next week boasting about how he/she got it for a mere fraction of the original price. Ouch!

For adults, online privacy usually isn’t much of an issue, except when it comes to financial matters. Who would want his credit card info or bank statement stolen, right? And sometimes, having your identity available online can help, especially if you use the Internet to market your business or services.

But with kids, having their identities publicly available online can be dangerous, as we discussed before. Here are a few ways to make sure your child is practicing good privacy online. Of course, these could also apply to you!

Don’t post your home address and telephone numbers. This is the easiest way that bad people can find you.

Don’t post the name of your school or your exact town or vicinity. Even if people don’t find your exact home address, they can still do some research, and your school and town would be a good place to start.

Use nicknames when blogging. When writing about people or yourself, it’s good to use pseudonyms instead of real names. And make sure that these nicknames are not easily identifiable or associated with the real identity of a person.

Don’t post photos for public consumption. It’s best if you keep your pictures viewable only by people whom you personally know. Many photo-sharing websites have this feature.

Don’t write too detailed information on your online journal. Strangers can use these information to make you feel as if they know you. If you’re writing a public blog, then be sure you do not reveal too much.

Respect the privacy of your friends. Don’t just make sure your privacy is protected. Also do the same for your friends. Do not have your friends real names, addresses and other details publicly available.

The best advice would be to consult with a parent knowledgeable in online privacy and security, when in doubt

The other day, I wrote a short intro about “Web 2.0″ applications, particularly blogs and social networking sites. Actually I feel like I’m preaching to the choir, since if you’re reading this, you are most probably aware of blogs and blogging. Still, it’s best to cover all our bases. A lot of people may know about the so-called new media, but are still not as vigilant about online security as they should be.

For those with kids in the adolescent to young adult ages, blogs and social networking sites can prove to be risky in terms of privacy and security. These sites, by nature, are used to share one’s experiences and identity online. Social networking sites, for instance, commonly feature personal profiles and photographs of the account owner. Blogs, meanwhile, can contain journal or diary-like entries, such as the author’s private thoughts, and what happened in the course of a day.

It’s just like taking a peek into a person’s mind, and knowing his/her thoughts, habits, problems, and other details–maybe even contact information and home addresses!

There are those who can use these information the wrong way. There may be predators, stalkers, and other people with malicious intent. And they can take advantage of the innocence of young individuals and do bad, abusive stuff online, or worse, they can bring it offline!

Next, I’ll share some tips on how to avoid being a target.

My 20-month-old son has NEVER slept through the night. I can’t help comparing him to my 4-year-old girl, who within a few days of taking her home from the hospital slept for 8 hour stretches. Well here’s some news: thats the first rule to assume when you have kids - siblings will always be different, especially when they’re of the opposite sex. I guess that’s why they tell you to avoid comparing, which isn’t too easy.

So my little boy, who is an utter sweetheart in every other way, can be a real nightmare when it comes to sleep. No fail, every single night (save two or three in his short existence, where I prematurely rejoice thinking he has done it- but the next day its back to the old), he’ll wake up two or three times a night, crying miserably to be rocked, danced or fed.

I am determined to stop this exhausting life for both our sakes (miraculously his sister sho shares a room with him sleeps like a log throughout), as I’ve also heard that bad sleep patterns this early and life can be taken into adulthood. Think of all those adults who have to rely on sleep medication, sound effects etc. Come to think of it now, there must be at least 3 people in my extended family who have this problem. Oh dear.

Here’s some advice I found from Dr.Greene when a desperate Mom with the same exact problem wrote in:

“….The first step in helping Nicholas fall asleep at night is to develop a bedtime ritual. This may include an evening feeding at least one-half hour before bed, bath time (a warm bath right before bed tends to make children sleepy), putting on a fresh diaper and clean pajamas, having Nicholas lie in his crib, and reading a bedtime story. Add one new element of the ritual per week for several weeks until you have established a routine that works well for your family. Not all of these steps are necessary, but you may find many of them helpful. At first you will need to stay by Nicholas’s crib, and perhaps keep reading to him, until he falls asleep. Down the road, you will be able to read for a set amount of time and then leave him alone to fall asleep. In the transition period, it is helpful to give him a children’s cassette tape player with a tape of his favorite stories being read by Mom and Dad. Often when children can turn the tape on and listen as long as they want, they will fall asleep very rapidly. This is particularly true when you tell them that you’ll come back in and check on them in a while.”

[tags]toddler,sleeping,sleep problems,sleeping through night[/tags]

Here is small selection of divorce books for parents worth checking out at your local bookstore.

1. Child Custody: Building Parenting Agreements that Work
by Mimi E. Lyster

A practical guide for dealing successfully with this touchy issue. Checklists and worksheets make the whole process with its somewhat daunting legal implications a lot simpler to face.

2. Its Not Your Fault Koko Bear
by Vicki Lansky

This is a heartwarming storybook for parents to read together with young children when facing a divorce. Parents with young kids have given this book glowing reviews saying how it helped their child get in touch with and understand their feelings when going through this difficult time. Kids really relate to this one. Highly recommended.

3. Dinosaurs Divorce
by Marc Brown

This time its dinosaurs taking on the emotional turmoil of divorce, but in a way that will engage kids and hopefully have a positive influence with its cheerfull illustrations. Its on the long side (31 pages) and the different chapters tackle issues from “What is Divorce” to “Living in Two Homes”. A good way for parents and children to open up honest dialogue.

4. Difficult Questions Kids Ask And Are Afraid To Ask About Divorce
by Meg F. Schneider

Parents with older kids (after preschool) were reassured with this book and claimed that the questions hit very close to home. The subjects and ages vary though, so an overall good range for parents.

Before you start planning tomorrow’s lunchbox, I thought it would be useful to make a quick list on what SHOULDNT go into the lunchbox. This is because of the gross amount of things you can find in any supermarket today - things, which masquerade as “healthy” items but are actually NOT.

Here’s what to be wary of:

1. Fruit Drinks - if its not 100% juice, its got very little of the real stuff in and probably masses of flavourings, sugar and coloring. Better choices to give are homemade smoothies or pure juice.

2. Fruit Snacks - I plead guilty to this as seen in my last post’s mention of fruit roll ups (but my daughter loves them!). Anything that says “with real fruit!” on it probably has very little fruit and gargantuan amounts of sugar. Yikes.

3. Processed Snacks - Cheese strings, cheese and cracker packs, and obviously crisps (despite being wholewheat etc) can be loaded with salt and saturated fats. Not good.

4. Flavoured and Kid’s Yougurt - Kids yogurt tend to be sweeter or worse, with those add-ins like sprinkles, chocolate etc which mean too far too sweet. Think of it as 5 teaspoons of white sugar in each pot.

5. Cereal Bars - On the outside these do look convincingly healthy, but the reality is actually about 40% sugar, 30% fat and some major cavities tomorrow. Did I scare you enough?