Yes, the unsavoury phenomena of “keeping up with the Joneses” has already started to rear its ugly head at my daughter’s kindergarten, and we Mothers have become accomplices.

At the age of 4-5, my daughter (and indeed her classmates) has become increasingly aware of what her friends have, prompting the need for her to have whatever it is too.

Take Rose, for instance, her classmate who is obviously over-indulged by her parents. She comes to school in a new outfit nearly every day, and her toy collection at home could rival Hamleys. N tells me that Rose does not have a strict bedtime (she can sleep anytime she wants, which is usually at 1 am with her Mother) and can have new toys any day of the week. The unfairness of it all!!

To a child’s eyes, Rose has hit the jackpot, but to us Moms (well, maybe not Rose), its a clear sign for the road to Veruca-ville. So every week, theres something N wants that one of her friends have got, or worse, a slighty envious comparison on how so-and-so’s bedroom/kitchen…house is bigger than ours. Luckily, even if we have a tiny flat in town, we have a massive garden at our beach property, so N takes pride in that.

I just cant help but feel somewhat scared of this burgeoning materialism at such young age. Kids nowadays have too many things, and its the fault of us parents for buying them for whatever reason - guilt? making up for what we may have lacked as kids? or maybe we’re also keepiing up with the Joneses?

My older daughter, P, is currently enrolled at a small preschool. There are only three levels–beginners, junior kinder and senior kinder–and the entire student population is only about 40 to 50 (divided into morning and afternoon sessions). However, we’ve been trying to look into other schools lately, especially the bigger ones. We’ve been thinking that since P will eventually have to move to a bigger school once she’s elementary age, it might be good to start now.

Many parents used to think bigger always meant better, especially with the stability (since the child won’t have to move schools). However, that may not necessarily be the case today.

Here are some of the pros and cons of big schools and smaller ones. Of course, I’m referring to private schools here.

Big schools are usually stable and already established. These would usually have classes from preschool up to high school, so parents need not worry about looking for another school when the child outgrows the school. Most of the time, big schools are recognized institutions, so it will be a very good reference when applying for college or when transferring to other schools.

Smaller schools, meanwhile, may not be as established as bigger ones. However, these are usually more flexible, and can accommodate progressive curricula, which are getting into fashion these days. Usually, parents can also have better involvement when in small schools. In my case, for instance, my wife teaches at my daughter’s preschool–so I know the people, and I feel comfortable leaving my kids with them.

It’s still a decision we have to make. Of course, there’s the question of finances (tuition costs are so high these days!). That’s worth another blog post altogether.

It’s an age-old question: what is the right time for a child to start attending school, or at least preschool. There is no exact answer to this question, though. The closest is it depends. In the times before it became custom for both mother and father to go to work every weekday, it was thought that it was best for children to remain at home until the time they’re old enough for elementary school (about six or seven). When families also felt the need for the mothers to work full-time, it became common for three or four-year olds to attend preschool, too.

One good way to check is to observe your child. If he has trouble with developing social skills like sharing and playing with other children by age four or five, then he/she most likely needs to attend preschool so as to have experience with social interaction before kindergarten. Most preschools these days use a developmental curriculum, which is focused not on academic learning, but on socializing and practical skills.

You can also check what your child’s interests are. Some preschools include play-based programs that can help with exploration in different fields like science and math, and these might be helpful especially in a child’s academic formation later on.

So the actual answer lies within your family! If you think the time is now, then it’s best if you can visit several preschools (best if they’re near your home) so you can personally see which ones seem most appropriate.

My daughter’s preschool has a lovely little Christmas tradition. Every year, at the school Christmas party, after the show where the kids sing carols and hold a nativity play ( my little one was Mary last year, and played the part so seriously - adorable!), Santa Claus himself comes to visit.

Its a huge surprise and thrill for the kids, and best of all, “jolly old Saint Nick” comes complete with a big sack of toys (pre-bought by the parents) for all the children. He then goes through his list (its a pretty small school, so this thankfully doesnt take too long), calling each child’s name and the talking about the times they were “naughty” or “nice” - followed by the present. Great for some positive reinforcement for the year ahead, don’t you think?

There’s a set price for all the presents, and the kids always come out happy, if a little peevish that Santa really did know what they were up to this year. Tomorrow, I give my daughter’s “naughty and nice” list in for Santa’s review, in time for the school party on Friday.

Naughty

Hitting her brother (she whacked him very hard on the forehead the other day, causing a nasty goose egg - apparently because he hit her with a block first)

Hitting and kicking her nanny (I swear, she really isnt a monster-child, but has put our nanny in tears because of some very aggressive behaviour).

Nice

Being a good Big Sister - Despite hitting her baby brother on rare occassions (ok, maybe 3x a week), there have been more times when she’s been really very sweet to him, especially when we went on our family holiday recently, where she looked after him quite a lot.

Sharing and Giving her Toys Away - A few times a year, I like to put aside a lot of their old toys that they don’t really play with anymore and fill a few bags to give away to needy children. She actually enjoys doing this and it makes me so proud to see her empathy and generosity (even when she wants to give away the very expensive Bratz doll we just bought last month!) to kids in need.

[tags]Christmas, Holidays, School, naughty or nice list, Santa[/tags]

October 24th is United Nations Day, which means a big school program for us parents where we’ll be getting to see our kids dress up and do a dance number or two. It also can mean that the school will be roping us parents in for a (dreaded) “parent activity”, which is what happened to me.

So at the beginning of the month, we were told by the school administrator that my daughter’s Kindergarten class would be representing Mexico for the big UN celebrations this year. It was to be a pretty big event - several classrooms representing different countries, and there was to be a big show (where the kids and teachers did several song and dance numbers), followed by an international food fair where each classroom/country would be serving food from our alloted country.

At the first big moms-meeting, only 8 of us showed up, out of a total 12. Not a bad turnout. We broke up into pairs, and yours truly was put into the costume committee with my pal and fellow mom, M. The decorations were to be taken care of by an art teacher and an architect and food by a factory owner and a very Martha-esque type (much warmer though) - a very workable team, I thought.

Out of all the Moms, I only knew one of them well (meaning that I could call her for a coffee), two so-so, and the rest merely by “hi!” at drop-off and pick up times at school. But by the end of it, we were all friends and having a laugh in spite of probably not having too much in common except for our kids. I guess thats one of the reasons why teachers make us do these things.

[tags]United Nations,UN,school presentation,food,Mexico[/tags]

Today my son had his first day of “school” at Gymboree. At 20 months, he joined the “Level 4″ class for twice a week sessions, one of which is “play“, the other being “music”. Before anything though, I’d like to advice new Moms from getting over-excited and enrolling their babies until they’ve tried out the classes several times.

All babies are different, and no matter how adorable (and baby brain-enhancing) Gymbo’s classes look, it doesn’t make sense to do it unless your child is ready and happy doing it.

Anyway, this wasn’t really his first day. His first try at Gymboree was at the tender age of about 9 months. He refused to crawl (which continued until he just got up and walked at nearly 1), and looked pretty stressed out when the very perky teacher cajoled him into going through a tunnel.

We tried again at about a year, this time for the music class, but still he looked a bit weirded out by the whole thing. Fast forward to about 5 months later, and this time I thought we’d give it a go again, but just for “free play” with his big sister. Well, he finally seemed to be enjoying it. And when we did another trial class last week, lo and behold - he LOVED it.

He must have been the most giggly, excited and pro-active kid there. He had the time of his life!! So now, I’ve finally signed him up for the next 2 months (in case you were wondering, it cost me about $200 for 16 sessions - but this includes unlimited play for as long as the enrollment is), and I’ll be letting you know how we get along. Fingers crossed, I hope it’ll last!

[tags]Gymboree,Play,Music,Babies,toddlers[/tags]

Today my husband and I attended our daughter’s PTC or “parent-teacher conference”. These meetings are a great way to know how your child is doing at school, what she’s been learning and its a chance to get to know her teacher as well - so its always a good idea to come prepared with any questions you may have.

Lately, our four-year-old has been going through an “everything-is-boring” stage, much to our frustration. I have no idea how she learned the dreaded concept, but just in the past couple of weeks, activities which she used to LOVE, like football or playgroup, has been labeled with “boring!” and a refusal to go. Sigh.

Well at school, she never ever says the “b” word and according to her teacher, shows much better behaviour than what we see at home. So its interesting to see the different sides to your child at home and at school - in our daughter’s case, her teacher noted distinct leadership qualities and a willingness to share, as well as some newfound shyness. At home that reads as bossy, not wanting to share toys with her baby brother, and the shyness? non-existent.

On top of that, there were some areas of concern - that she needed more help with writing lower case letters. Also, I need to work on her self-esteem as apparently sometimes she takes her classmates’ (innocent?) teasing to heart.

So, expect more posts on that - I’m off to research.

Before you start planning tomorrow’s lunchbox, I thought it would be useful to make a quick list on what SHOULDNT go into the lunchbox. This is because of the gross amount of things you can find in any supermarket today - things, which masquerade as “healthy” items but are actually NOT.

Here’s what to be wary of:

1. Fruit Drinks - if its not 100% juice, its got very little of the real stuff in and probably masses of flavourings, sugar and coloring. Better choices to give are homemade smoothies or pure juice.

2. Fruit Snacks - I plead guilty to this as seen in my last post’s mention of fruit roll ups (but my daughter loves them!). Anything that says “with real fruit!” on it probably has very little fruit and gargantuan amounts of sugar. Yikes.

3. Processed Snacks - Cheese strings, cheese and cracker packs, and obviously crisps (despite being wholewheat etc) can be loaded with salt and saturated fats. Not good.

4. Flavoured and Kid’s Yougurt - Kids yogurt tend to be sweeter or worse, with those add-ins like sprinkles, chocolate etc which mean too far too sweet. Think of it as 5 teaspoons of white sugar in each pot.

5. Cereal Bars - On the outside these do look convincingly healthy, but the reality is actually about 40% sugar, 30% fat and some major cavities tomorrow. Did I scare you enough?

To continue from the last post, a good way to get started on daily lunchbox planning is to do it based on the 4 vital ingredients. I’ve given some ideas too below.

1. Protein

Try sandwiches filled with chicken, eggs, tuna, cheese or ham (try the turkey kind). My daughter also likes pasta or rice with chicken or tuna.

2. Complex Carbs

Complex carbohydrates, as opposed to refined carbs, release energy slowly, ensuring that your child has enough energy to last the day and wont need a coffee after lunch. Find this in whole grain breads, pasta, brown or red rice and the good old banana.

3. Calcium

Kids simply need calcium for their growth, so do remember cheese, yougurts, fromage frais and milk (including milkshakes). Experts say kids above 5 can go low-fat, but personally I’ll keep mine on whole until they hit puberty. It just seems they should enjoy whole as long as they can.

4. Fruit and Veg

Heres where they’ll get their all-important vitamins, anti-oxidants, minerals and other lovely things. I sneak the veg in pasta sauce (tomatoes and carrots), chicken meatballs (with spinach) and even cake (carrot & pineapple). My kids love raisins, oranges, mangoes apples (with cinnamon sugar - the brown kind) and broccoli too, so I count myself lucky. Oh, and corn too. Does that count as a vegetable?

5. The Treat (entirely optional)

Ok, this bit is optional depending on how much of a health-obsessed Mom you are. But even if you are, you can kinda cheat. As a treat, you could throw in one of those fruit leather things (or fruit roll ups if you’re lazy and feeling indulgent) or some cake or cookies (homemade is better, but a raisin oat variety or wholewheat teddy grahams from the store is ok too).

On Martha Stewart’s site, she drew funny faces on fruit with edible markers or better yet, do as my Mother did when I was little and make faces on top of brown rice using grapes and veg slivers. It got me to eat my complex carbs, and made me the envy of my 1st grade class.

Like billions of Moms everywhere, every morning (or the night before for the more organized ones) I have to come up with what to put in my daughter’s lunchbox. Quite a challenge as each day must have 3 important factors:

1. Yum factor (she’ll eat it)

2. Health factor (to diminish any guilt on my part that I’m feeding my kid right)

3. Variety factor (kids thrive on this in waves, after one particular fave is no longer a fave you’ll have to experiment to find a new one so variety does matter)

And now that my child has both snacktime and lunch at school, I have to be extra creative.

It is extra difficult to succumb to temptation at the supermarket in the name of convenience, where there are miles of aisles devoted to pre-packaged biscuits and crisps, all brightly coloured with kid-ogle-worthy characters but unhappily laden with all the scary mono-poly-whatever fats, salts, refined sugar, msg and other frightening dyes.

I’m no granola Mom (and occasionally buy oreos and take them to yikes- Mac Donalds) but I do like to think that I’m not filling my kids with scary things that will pop out and haunt them later on. And that the rosy glow of health is also a look I like to see on them.

According to a nutritionist a healthy lunchbox should have the capability of improving your child’s attention, behaviour and learning throughout the day and into the afternoon, providing 1/3 of your child’s daily requirements of nutrients.

So to simplify:

1. Protein: to keep them alert

2. Complex Carbs: for slow-release energy

3. Calcium: for growth, healthy bones and teeth

4. Fruit and veg: for vitamins and minerals

More on my next post on ideas for this. Stay tuned Moms.