Unfortunately, many women and men encounter situations of domestic violence on a daily basis and during those accounts, sometimes children are involved. This article in no way wishes to belittle the effect of domestic violence on the man or woman involved, but we want to take a look at the effects this horrible event has on the children who witness it. When a stone is thrown in the water, it creates ripples that seem to go on forever. There comes a time when we can no longer see them. The toll domestic violence takes on a child is much the same. There are effects that happen that we simply miss sometimes and so they never get addressed. Here are a few.
They Feel Responsible
When children are exposed to domestic violence even once, they question their involvement. They ask themselves questions like, “Did I do something to cause this? Is my existence a burden to my parents? Am I enough? Do I belong here?” Children are not equipped to handle the emotional stress that they receive when in the presence of domestic violence. There needs to be a time, prompt time, that your children are sat down and reassured of their freedom from guilt.
They Feel Guilt
Children have a strong need to love and protect both parents. When they are subjected to one or the other parent being screamed at or beaten, an overwhelming sense of guilt encompasses them, They feel as if they should be able to protect the injured parent and at the same time, have conflicting feelings about how to handle the parent that is doing the abusing. This cut to a child’s emotional and mental boundaries can often leave scars that don’t make themselves known until adulthood when the child makes his/her way into their own marriage.
Constantly Live in Fear
If a child lives in the confines of violence in the home, they are constantly in a state of fear. What will happen today? Will the violence be turned on me? Will I lose my parent? Is it safe to talk even? These are just a sample of the anxieties that linger in a child’s heart when they are surrounded with this. Many view feeling safe in your own home as a right of childhood. This is impossible if there is domestic violence. If this is the situation in your home, get out, and then make sure that you provide a place where your child can feel safe and protected.
Domestic violence is more and more common. As the moral fabric of society continues to unravel, we see more and more this and it is more and more accepted as the norm, unfortunately. Not that it is right, but the more it happens, the more society becomes desensitized to it. Don’t allow this to blot out your vision where your children are concerned. They see it, hear it, and are hurt by it.