Comments on: Top 5 Parenting Issues And My Take On Them

By: Lilia

Lilia — Sat, 10 Jul 2010 01:37:59 +0000

I like what you said about the underage drinking! I work with teenagers and find the subject of underage drinking to be something they have a tough time understanding. I think as an adult, its important to communicate that there is nothing wrong with alcohol, it’s not a bad thing as long as it is used responsably. But with that being said, in our country it is illegal to drink when you are under 21- and thats that.

By: Kathy Lynn

Kathy Lynn — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 17:56:13 +0000

I am a parenting speaker and author. On this issue of hitting kids, what we do know is that the research is in. In an analysis of 88 studies over 62 years it is clear that hitting kids is simply punishment and has clear downsides. Yes, we know those who were hit and are fine but each smack we give a child increases the risk of problems like impaired parent-child relationship, poorer mental health, increased aggression and so on.
The analogy is that many of us were raised with parents who smoked everywhere and we are fine but many of us aren’t. We have heart problems and cancer or lung disorders. It’s about risk.
And it’s simply not a nice way to raise kids. We hit them, they hit others.

By: Chris

Chris — Tue, 06 Jul 2010 18:34:29 +0000

Great post on problems facing parents! On behavioral medications, I agree with you that you should ask for multiple opinions and consider other treatment possibilities. I believe that many children would benefit from other drug-free approaches to treatment, such as limiting sugar intake, keeping a regular sleep schedule, and getting a lot of excercise.

By: Jack

Jack — Mon, 05 Jul 2010 15:09:49 +0000

My father had the same take on spanking you did. I became a life-long spanking fetishist. Spanking teaches a kid nothing. At least nothing you want it to teach.

By: Steve

Steve — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 04:52:54 +0000

I agree on points 2, 3 and 4.

Re Spanking – theres been numerous research that indicates rewards as well as punishments are not effective at changing behaviour in people. I’d highly recommend reading Alfie Kohns “Punished by Rewards” for an interesting (and very challenging) take on this topic.

Re Drinking – I believe the French have a very sensible approach to drinking, most children are raised with respect for alcohol from an early age and getting drunk is typically discouraged. Unfortunately in Britain, most childrens experience of alochol is seeing adults getting obliterated at family parties or coming home from the pub smashed. The message we tend to send to children is “When you get to 18, you too can go to the pub and write yourself off… but not until you’re 18 !!”.

By: Jackson

Jackson — Wed, 16 Jun 2010 17:33:03 +0000

I agree with you on all those points except underage drinking. I think kids are gonna find alcohol somewhere anyways, so parents should teach their children to keep their drinking within reason. Things like safe grads are great. There’s a limit to how much you can drink, rides are arranged, you have to have an invitation, and there’s some parents there to keep things in control.

http://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/aa67/aa67.htm

“Each year, approximately 5,000 young people under the age of 21 die as a result of underage drinking; this includes about 1,900 deaths from motor vehicle crashes, 1,600 as a result of homicides, 300 from suicide, as well as hundreds from other injuries such as falls, burns, and drownings”.

Having a responsible adult around could get rid of some of the bad things that happen when kids are drinking. Having a parent there taking keys away from people who’ve been drinking, preventing fights, etc. would make things a lot safer.

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By: Ria

Ria — Fri, 28 May 2010 11:11:21 +0000

i like your post….i agree with your medication point of view proper consultation is necassary before jumping to medicine

By: parentingaling

parentingaling — Tue, 11 May 2010 09:45:34 +0000

Breastfeeding is a complicated one. Part of what makes it hard is that (in contrast to two generations ago, when – as my grandmother said – you were considered barbaric if you breastfed your baby) today all the subliminal and not so-subliminal messages that are sent by society are that you are a second-class mother if you don’t breastfeed. Which is very hard for women who are having a hard time – they may persist and drive themselves crazy in the pursuit of breastfeeding, when what their baby really needs is a calm, functioning mother.

By: Brittany

Brittany — Sun, 09 May 2010 18:21:25 +0000

Thanx alot for the last comment, Im a new mom and often get caught up in the “correct” way to do things, and honestly it causes alot more stress. Im ani-spanking and my husband is pro..still no solution he just does his way n i do it mine. My breast fed boy is so attached we always co-sleep no problems so far and we all get a better nights sleep. And I have a very strict opinion on breast feeding, everyone could n should do it. I think people have a very unrealistic view of breast feeding when they are pregnant which leads to failure. Breast feeding is going to be challenging! like everything else in parenting.. Happy mothers day!