Remember all those times you’d come home and catch your daughter playing dress up with your clothes? She’d have your blouse on as a dress, wear your pretty pearls and have a whole gunk of make up on. Bet you were either mad or laughed your head off.

That may have been when she was much younger. Now, she no longer wears your clothes because she feels your clothes are too motherly for her taste. She does however periodically borrow your make-up and wear it to school.

It is actually quite normal for girls in their teens to start wearing make up but at what age and how much? Unless your daughter is performing on stage, 15 to 18 is the time when they truly start to experiment with cosmetics. It will be a lot better if instead of scolding her, you help her learn to apply them properly rather than having her use the wrong products. She doesn’t realize it but until they are in their mid twenties, their beautiful skin doesn’t really need make-up.

Teach her the art of making up by making down. A little powder, mascara and lip gloss is often enough to enhance our beauty. All the highest paid fashion models and actresses do not walk around with pounds of cosmetics on their face. They use just enough to highlight their best features and to add just a touch of color to make them look healthy.

In fact, make it a fun time where you and your daughter can make each other up. Then you can give each other a fashion show and have your pictures taken together.

[tags]parenting,teenagers,make up,models[/tags]

You walk into your home after work and get deafened by the loud music blasting from the radio. The walls and the floor are shaking but your son is oblivious. He is absolutely lost in his music, jumping around and pretending to be a rockstar.

You find yourself shaking your head and saying that’s not music. That is noise! It’s just someone shouting and making no sense while others make even more noise with their guitars and drums. Hmmm…remember when our parents used to say that about our favorite music?

Every generation complains of a generation gap, especially in music. Our great-grandparents preferred listening to jazz music or the blues. Our grandparents were listening to Frank Sinatra. Our parents were listening to rock and roll. We listened to metal, wave and R&B. Now the kids listen to hip hop and rap.

Most parents object to the language used by the singers or performers of hip hop and rap. They are such angry music which calls to our teens. It matches the mood of our angst filled kids.

Still, there are other performers popular among the kids that are good and are actually pleasant to listen to. Christina Aguilera, Justin Timberlake, Westlife and many other artists have produced quite a number of songs that are danceable and easy on our ears. There is actually quite a variety available.

Take the time to listen to your kid’s music. You may be surprised to find some that you like and you may just surprise your kids if you sing along to one of their favorite hits. It may even be something that brings you closer together.

[tags]parenting,teenagers,music,hiphop,rock and roll,Christina Aguilera, Justin Timberlanke, Frank Sinatra[/tags]

The phrase sleeping like a baby is one we’ve grown up hearing. Then you become a parent and you realize sometimes your baby won’t sleep at all! You’ve barely put her to bed and she’s crying again. You’ve fed, burped and changed your baby’s diaper. You checked if he’s running a fever, checked for any possible causes of discomfort yet your baby keeps crying and you are now frazzled and worried.

Naturally, being loving parents, the first thing we rule out is illness. Better to be overprotective than too late, right? Thank goodness for pediatricians who truly understand that we want our children to be well and don’t mind being bothered at odd hours when we truly are at a loss.

Now that you’re sure that you baby’s health is fine, it is time to check your little ones sleeping habits. You may need to make some adjustments if your child has developed some habits that contribute to the restless nights. Hopefully these tips will help you get your kid to sleep through the night.

• Napping is normal for babies but try not to let them nap more than 3 hours during the day.
• When bedtime comes around, as your baby gets sleepy put him in his crib. Get him used to associating his crib as time to sleep.
• Avoid rocking your baby to sleep. Though we all love cuddling our kids, doing this develops a pattern where they need you to actually rock them to bed everynight. Get them used to quieting down in their crib instead, without the motion.
• A lullaby is a favorite method to soothe your child to sleep. Put on some soft music for your baby. There is a vast collection available intended just for babies.
• If your baby does wake up in the middle of the night avoid picking him up or playing with him. Keep your midnight visits short and soothing and encourage your baby to go back to sleep. It may be as simple as your child needs a diaper change which you can do quickly, quietly and get him settled in again.
• Avoid giving your child a pacifier before sleeping. Babies used to this usually cry if it falls out of their mouth and you spend your night plugging it in. As we all know, none of us sleep with a pacifier so your child can do without it.

[tags]parenting,babies,sleep,tips[/tags]

Bullies are everywhere. They are not limited to school, they are not limited to a particular age. They exist in all countries all over the world.

Most of the time bullies appear more frequently in the elementary years. There are fewer of them in high school, possibly because their peers have forced most to conform. People, generally do not like bullies. As they grow older and hopefully develop a good sense of what is right, our children will no longer just let bullies harass co-students or themselves.

How do you know if your child is being bullied? The signs may not all be obvious. Most can actually be very subtle. This includes:

• Your child begins to dislike going to school. They will want to avoid the place where they are being bullied, especially if they know that they are not yet capable of averting it from happening.
• Your child becomes moody. If your child is showing sudden signs of wanting to be alone or not wanting to talk with anyone, or even just being less himself you may want to keep an eye on your child and see if anything is going on.
• Your child being hungrier when he comes home from school than before. Unless your child has joined a sport it may be that they aren’t getting any lunch.
• Your child suddenly has no savings. Most kids tend to splurge on candy and hotdogs but they usually do save something for something they really want, like comic books. If your child suddenly has no savings but no additions to his collection, someone may be taking his money from him.
• Your child comes home with bruises, damaged clothes or in poor condition compared to when he left home for school. This would be the most obvious sign and means you really need to steo up and protect your child.

[tags]bully,kids,school,parenting[/tags]

As soon as they hit their teens, it seems like that the time is being counted down to their day of full independence. In some countries it automatically happens when they hit 18, or whatever is the legal age of the country they live in. For others it is when they begin working. For some, it is only when they get married.

Whichever is the case wherever you live, letting go can be difficult. You’ve watched over their every breath. Their activities and activities involving their interests form a major portion of your day. You have guided and protected them all of their lives. Suddenly, they are moving on and into a new home.

It may sound trite but it really is true. No matter how old you or your kids get, you will always be their parents. Though they may not believe it yet, they will need you even if they are all grown up. It will help keep your relationship good if you can let them go without clinging or being too fussy. After all, everyone grows up; including you.

All we can do is hope that we prepared them well for being on their own. Hopefully they are well equipped to not only survive on their own, but to thrive. It is now their turn to make decisions as well as mistakes.

It isn’t easy to just stand there and watch but we need to. Think of them as being the lead actor in the film of their life and you are a supporting character. Our new role is to be there to support them when they need us.

[tags]parenting,growing up,adulthood,independence,support[/tags]

It is never too early or too late to teach your kids an appreciation for the arts. Music a rhythm in everyones blood and everyone has a creative side, Expose them to the arts and help them develop interest and skill.

Where to start? Look for local musical productions that your kids can relate to. Annie is a favorite and so is Oliver Twist. There’s the Sound of Music, The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, and the Wiz. Who knows? You may even find your child on stage one of these days.

If you aren’t really into theater, how about getting your kids into Disney. They have one of the widest collections of plays, musicals and movies made for television and wide screen. Their animation series starting with Snow White, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Little Mermaid, Hercules and Aladdin, just to name a few, have been entertaining kids (and adults since Walt Disney first decided to push for his dream. The music that went with his films are beautiful and are now classic to the families who watched them.

If your child expresses an interest to learn an instrument, be encouraging. The most practical instruments to learn are piano or guitar - just to get started. The beauty of these two instruments is that your child can play the instrument and still sing (if he is so inclined). He might even be inspired to begin composing his own music.

It works a lot better though if you also have an interest in the arts. Your child wants to be encouraged but not forced. Your enthusiasm will help them develop a love for the arts without them feeling like they are going for a visit to the dentist.

[tags]arts,musicals,plays,Anni,The Wiz,Narnia,The Lion,The Witch and The Wardrobe,Disney,Snow White, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty,Hercules,Aladdin,Little Mermaid[/tags]

They yell at each other, nag each other, bicker, scream, bully each other and basically go, “Mom, look at what he or she is doing”. It gives you a headache just listening to them. The never ending raised voices between your kids grates on your nerves.

Why do kids fight?

For one, they are competing for what they see as a limited resource: your time, attention and love. As each new child is added to your family, that is yet another person to take your attention away from them. As we all know, there is nothing like knowing our parents actively love us and having 20 minutes of your time if your time if you only have an hour to spend with the family just isn’t enough. This is especially true if there is a new baby in the house. They know that babies need more attention, but they need you too.

Another reason may be that they are trying to establish their own identity. Siblings too close in age tend to have to share too many things, from clothes to friends. It can be both an advantage and a disadvantage. It is very difficult to be an individual when you practically have no personal space.

So, what can be done?

Try not to play favorites and give everyone equal time. Don’t give just one kid a special treat. Make everything a family thing as much as possible.

Recognize their individuality. Praise each for the unique things that they are good at. Be aware of their individual strengths and emphasize the blessing that that uniqueness brings your family.

If possible, find a way so that each child has the necessary space and privacy. Everyone needs that, adult or child. We all need times of peace and quiet and time filled with our brand of noise…erm…music.

[tags]parenting,relationships,sibling rivalry,fighting,personal space,individuality,brothers,sisters[/tags]

Summer is hot and humid. The heat is actually stifling at times. There is nothing you’d like more than to jump into the nearest pool and cool off.

So you take your family for a weekend swmming holiday. Everyone is is high spirits. They are looking forward to being school free and spending time with you. The resort has 6 varieties of pools from a kid’s pool to an olympic size pool. There’s even a jacuzzi. Best of all, there are slides.

As soon as you get there, everyone rushes off to the poolside. Looks like everyone is having a great time. You find your 8 year old daughter sitting at the poolside just swinging her feet or jumping around in the small pool. She refuses to dip her body in and you ‘re getting frustrated because you really want her to learn how to swim. Every attempt you make ends in her crying or having a screaming fit.

Parents, we know you mean well. We all know they’ll have an even better time if they can swim properly and you’ll worry less about them since they are less likely to panic or drown if they know how to handle themselves in water deeper than their height.

It isn’t easy to get over fear and scolding your kid won’t make the fear go away. Don’t resort to throwing them in the pool to “sink or swim”. It will just heighten the fear and turn it into a phobia.

Try a little gentle persuasion. Tow your kid around a pool about shoulder deep for them. Teach them how to float on their back, then on their front. Teach them how to paddle their legs properly. get them some floaters so that they learn to use what they’ve learned in a deeper pool without fearing that they will drown. Who knows, they may eventually become swimming champions.

Books are always a wonderful gift to give to anyone, including kids. They help enhance thinking and imagination. There is no such thing as boredom to a child who can read. In fact, the sooner they learn to love reading the better for the child.

As parents we want our kids to be well rounded so it is a good idea to get them reading on a variety of topics. Help them to discover their interests and develop thir passion for learning. It is also a great way to get some quality time with your kid, reading together or just talking about stories you both enjoyed.

How would you like your green eggs and ham? With a fox or in a box?

Green Eggs and Ham is a classic that kids everywhere have enjoyed. Marked as a reader for beginner’s, it is filled withy wacky rhymes and pictures that have been making kids laugh since the 1960’s. It is still one of the best books for teaching the value of perseverance and is a great example of salesmanship - that is never too early a lesson to teach our kids. Oh, and they taste delicious too! You can teach your kids to make green eggs and ham after they learn to read the book.

The classic stories are also a good collection to let them read. The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, What Katy Did, Black Beauty and 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea are just a few of the well written stories that have entertained generations of kids. They are great books to help bridge the generation gap that every family experiences.

Science fiction and fantasy books are a very special treat. Let your child’s imagination soar with Eragon and Harry Potter. Let them enjoy the punny humore of Piers Anthony’s Xanth series. Let them fly without wings in the pages of these books.

Of course, detective and adventure stories are always a favorite. Get your child started early on deductive reasoning. Let his inquisitive mind work to solve the case before he gets to the end of the book. He may just surprise you and grow up to be one of the finest detectives when he grows up.

Ever noticed how kids will keep pestering you just when you are intent on doing something. The more engrossed you are, the more they will bug you. You just want an hour to enjoy your game and they want to play it for you. It can be annoying!

Truth is they just want to be part of what you’re doing. If you are having fun, they want to have fun with you. If you enjoy cooking, they will try and enjoy it too. They love helping you decorate for christmas. They’ll even try to help wrap presents.

Of course there are times that you have to say no but before you tell them they can’t why not check if there is someway they can take part. For example, you’re busy in the kitchen getting dinner ready and you don’t really want them around your knives. How about just having them peel the veggies or wash the potatoes.

If you’re painting, why not give your kid a paintbrush too and assign him his own corner to color? He may not do as big a space as you and his corner may not be as even but that is easily taken care of.

Do you love word games, the crosswords maybe? Get a book of word puzzles that the two of you can do together. Invite him to bring his puzzles to where you sit and you can sit companionably together as you each solve your games.

These may seem like small things for them to do but the effect on them is huge. Kids love to “help out”. Let them and watch as they amaze you with what they can do.